Psychological Balancing Act

I’ve had perhaps my most challenging couple of days as a hockey coach this weekend as an unforecasted storm was unleashed in the dressing room of my girls’ team during a local tournament.

I first started seeing some cracks in our teams’ communal armour a little over a week ago when I noticed a couple of players conducting their pre-game warm up and preparation away from the rest of the team. As the players are 13 and 14 years old, I had decided to give them the freedom to conduct their pre-game stretching and rituals on their own, with minimal supervision assuming they would fall together in lock step. However, some felt others were not following the team line. I tried to address the situation at the time by reminding the players of the importance of an all for one and one for all attitude; the importance of playing and acting as a team.

A second pre-game issue involved head-high shots being fired at our goaltenders. The purpose of these shots is to warm the goalies up; give them a chance to get used to the feel of the puck. But they don’t want to feel it up around their noggins. Players launching the questionable salvos argued they were only trying to work on their shots, but failed to realize this practicing should not happen a mere 10 feet in front of the keeper. We suggested if they needed practice is should be done from well out above the faceoff circles. Even some parents in the stands (not only those of the netminders) raised issue with the proximity of these shots out of concern for player safety. We had tried to talk through the whole situation in a previous practice, but our discussion seemed to have fallen on a few deaf ears.

I found out quickly divisions within the team were drawn a little deeper than I realized. Factions had apparently formed over the last several weeks centred around a couple of particularly strong personalities. I knew from the beginning that managing different personalities came with the territory, but I admittedly underestimated how divisive these temperaments could be or how quickly they could attack the fabric which holds a team together. I even had one player questioning her position and interest in continuing. Her parents weighed in as well with claims of a long smoldering flame of discontent. I obviously had no idea things had reached such a febrile pitch.

I decided, with some decided trepidation, a frank team meeting was required prior to our next game to air whatever differences had arisen; a meeting I knew had the potential to go sideways with dire results. I was as open and honest as I could be with my players’ delicate psyches again recognizing they are for the most part young, but rapidly maturing adults. I told them the negative stuff had to stop if we hope to have any success as a team. Harsh feelings were visible and verbalized. Then again a lot of good questions and comments were conveyed. At the end I believe we made some progress, though only time will tell. We were able to pull out a victory with a strong effort in the game which followed. And maybe this win along with a few more will serve to heal some wounds. Yet, I know this is a situation we will need to monitor more closely now that some damage has been done.

This is the part of coaching I knew about, but hoped, I would not have to deal with. Even lost a few hours sleep over it.

On the brighter hockey side, the team actually prospered through the turmoil managing to get into the semi-finals of the tourney. That’s where our journey ended this morning as we dropped the semi-final tilt to our oh-so familiar league rivals by a score of 4-2. Here’s hoping the scales weigh more in our favour both on and off the ice from here on in.

#imahockeydad

Focusing on the Same Thing

At our practice last night I called the Sharks out as I and another coach noted a distinct lull in intensity.  A couple of players were heading to and lingering around the water bottles a little too long, others were down on a knee for extended period of time while a couple of others were actually splayed out on the ice at the end of drills like they’d been shot. I was fairly confident the problem wasn’t one of conditioning, but rather one of focus. The same problem has seemingly been plaguing this squad in all of the games they’ve lost so far this season. To date, we’ve been able to match the speed of nearly every team we’ve played. We’ve been able to out-work and out-hustle most teams.  Yet we’ve only managed to do that for an entire game on maybe one or two occasions.  Even our finest effort to data, a five-goal outburst in the first period, of a game was followed by two periods of hanging on for a 5-3 victory.

So I posed my “loss/lack of focus” theory to the players at practice. They all, to a player, contended conditioning is not an issue.  Though that may have in this been prompted by the realization that admitting a conditioning problem = conditioning drills, which in turn = lots of skating followed by even more skating.  I tried to reinforce how important it is for them to maintain their intensity for three full periods. We’ve told them in games where they are not the most talented group that they can compensate by being the hardest working.  In this they are not unique, as sports are chock full of successful teams who reap their successes via their determined efforts.  As always, I try to be careful to temper my expectations with the realization that we are instructing 13 and 14 year old female athletes; who have yet to mature psychologically and who may have any number of other influences on their developing minds; from parents, to school, to boys, etc. That is not to say they don’t comprehend the message being delivered, but rather they may not fully realize how, nor have the capacity, to process what we are attempting to relay along with all of the other conflicting messages they are receiving.  We plead for our roughly 30-40 minutes of focus per game all the same.

And so today we entered a guaranteed four-game tournament a few hours north of home with games against two familiar rivals from our regular league, who we get to play in 2 of our 3 games tomorrow (a busy day, indeed).  Tournaments represent opportunities to refine team tactics and build team bonds.  I was heartened to hear that before our first game tonight the team held its own meeting, without prompting from any coaches, to talk about their focus.  Sounds like my message was received, which again is all I can ever ask for. I’m genuinely pleased if even a little bit of what I say sinks in.  My plan for today’s pre-game speech was to continue the focus discussion. Their own pre-game chat served to reinforce my motivational intent. The start of the game to follow was further validation as there was a distinct sense of focus displayed on the ice.  And while there were some tense moments in what would ultimately be a 2-1 triumph, buoyed by a fine goaltending performance, we could not question the girls effort or desire to win. Our only criticism tonight came in the form of a plea for the players to not rush in pressure situations, which is always much easier said than done from behind the bench. The only goal against us this evening came with 9.5 seconds left on the clock when support broke down.  An errant puck found its way slowly through a sea of skates and sticks to wreck a deserved shutout for our keeper.

Tomorrow’s challenge will be to establish and maintain the desired focus through no less than three games beginning at 10am and ending at 10pm, with the third contest coming against perhaps our greatest league rival, who dealt us a  2-1 loss only seven days ago.  Quite the task for a group of 17 teenage athletes, who may rather want to hang out at the hotel pool and who certainly didn’t want to hear me announce a 10:30pm curfew after tonight’s game.  Yet, I’ve faith the majority will indeed honour the bedtime policy.  My own Devil lies slumbering in a pull-out hotel couch only a couple of feet away as I record today’s events.  I am hopeful of reporting back on a playoff berth tomorrow evening, however, as usual, only time, effort and a decided level of focus will weave that tale to its conclusion.

#imahockeydad

Sharks Bounce Back

The Devil and her team had an excellent outing the night before last in which they earned a 3-1 victory. Then again tonight they came out strong and played three good periods of hockey in a 0-0 tie against an important rival; a team they lost to the last time they played.  Their early season record sits at 2-1-2.  I am told the coach delivered a focused message about playing aggressively and being the first to the puck before the last victory. They have since been all that and then some.  The girls are beating the other team to the puck, winning the battles on the boards and getting more shots on net.

The Devil for her part was coming off a couple of lack-lustre performances leaving many, including yours truly, wondering why she was not playing up to her potential. This season we have seen flashes of speed, but they have been relatively scarce. She has been making good plays/passes with the puck.  She has scored a few goals. However, hockey mom, I and a few other observers who have seen her play in the years past, know she has more to offer. Whether it was the coach’s speech or mom/dad’s pre- and post-game exhortations; something appears to have sunken in. She, like her teammates, has picked up the pace.  She’s skating harder; particularly on the back-check, which really tells you how much more committed she is.

As a hockey parent, who puts time and a few bucks up for the kids to play, you really want to see them give their best effort.  There are generally extenuating circumstances.  Mood swings are not uncommon with pubescent teenagers; boys and girls alike; so we always need to keep that in mind.  At the same time, we can appeal to their understanding of the importance of commitment. personal growth and teamwork.  They get it. Sometimes it’s just the who and the how the message is delivered.  As parents/coaches we don our psychologist hats, try a variety of approaches depending on the personality we’re dealing with then hope for the best.

Whatever’s caused the recent change, the effect is welcomed by those who understand the ability and potential of the player and the team.  Another lull can/will undoubtedly come as it does with all players/teams, but now we can all reflect back to the last couple of games. We can offer the reminder of what we know is possible. Then we can hope the message resonates again to affect the desired response.  We know ya can do, so just do it!  Oh that it were that easy. Games are lost and won as much between the ears as they are on the ice. So we’ll continue to work in both places hoping for positive results.

#imahockeydad

Sharks Bounce Back

The Devil and her team had an excellent outing the night before last in which they earned a 3-1 victory. Then again tonight they came out strong and played three good periods of hockey in a 0-0 tie against an important rival; a team they lost to the last time they played.  Their early season record sits at 2-1-2.  I am told the coach delivered a focused message about playing aggressively and being the first to the puck before the last victory. They have since been all that and then some.  The girls are beating the other team to the puck, winning the battles on the boards and getting more shots on net.

The Devil for her part was coming off a couple of lack-lustre performances leaving many, including yours truly, wondering why she was not playing up to her potential. This season we have seen flashes of speed, but they have been relatively scarce. She has been making good plays/passes with the puck.  She has scored a few goals. However, hockey mom, I and a few other observers who have seen her play in the years past, know she has more to offer. Whether it was the coach’s speech or mom/dad’s pre- and post-game exhortations; something appears to have sunken in. She, like her teammates, has picked up the pace.  She’s skating harder; particularly on the back-check, which really tells you how much more committed she is.

As a hockey parent, who puts time and a few bucks up for the kids to play, you really want to see them give their best effort.  There are generally extenuating circumstances.  Mood swings are not uncommon with pubescent teenagers; boys and girls alike; so we always need to keep that in mind.  At the same time, we can appeal to their understanding of the importance of commitment. personal growth and teamwork.  They get it. Sometimes it’s just the who and the how the message is delivered.  As parents/coaches we don our psychologist hats, try a variety of approaches depending on the personality we’re dealing with then hope for the best.

Whatever’s caused the recent change, the effect is welcomed by those who understand the ability and potential of the player and the team.  Another lull can/will undoubtedly come as it does with all players/teams, but now we can all reflect back to the last couple of games. We can offer the reminder of what we know is possible. Then we can hope the message resonates again to affect the desired response.  We know ya can do, so just do it!  Oh that it were that easy. Games are lost and won as much between the ears as they are on the ice. So we’ll continue to work in both places hoping for positive results.

#imahockeydad